Re-inventing Your Sex Life is Sexy Sunday # 26

So I was thinking about last weeks Sexy Sunday post and I wanted to thank you all for all your kind and sometimes kinky words. Yes I am submissive in the bedroom. But don’t get me wrong I am not a slave. That may be fine for some but for me that’s just not what being submissive is about. At least not in my home.

Now don’t take this wrong but I’ve been in a relationship where the man of the house kept me under his thumb. He was mentally abusive and when that relationship was over I vowed never to let any man take over my life the way that he did every again. Now being submissive in the bedroom is totally different. My Sir or Dom is kind, he takes care of my needs before his own. Yes he expects respect but he gives me the respect that I deserve too.

We talk about our kinky little sex life. And I know he would never hurt me. I trust him completely. I never have to worry that he’s going to do something to me while I’m indisposed. He always makes sure my needs and wants are taken care of. And he’s amazing.

My bedroom is my sexual sanctuary. It’s not cluttered with stuff and when we are in there together I know I will leave there with my dignity as well as rosy cheeks. And I will feel like I’m on top of the world. Over the thirty years we’ve been together we have re-invented our sex life again and again.

In my D/s relationship I am his priority. And that is something that I’ve always been to my husband. He tells me every day that I am beautiful. And he loves that I’m confident in my own way.  But I don’t think he realizes that he’s the one that has given me that confidence. Or maybe that’s what that oh so sexy smirk on his face is about.

We talk about everything and nothing is off-limits in my home and especially in our sanctuary. When I am mad or upset with my husband or Sir we don’t let it stew for days. He usually lets me cool down and then we talk about what it is that’s pissed me off. It’s in these moments that he somehow gets me to laugh.  And even though I hate it I know that he only has my best interest at heart. It’s not easy to be mad at someone that’s making you smile or laugh. I guess I just can’t resist it when he looks at me with those sexy blue eyes. But he can’t resist me either. Giggling, he he..

He knows me so well. He is the one person that can calm me down when life is dealing me another horrible hand. He thinks of my well-being before his own. He’s not selfish. And in turn I think of his feelings before my own. He listens to what I have to say. He doesn’t just pacify me and not hear what I’ve just said. He truly listens. This is one of those relationships that most people get disgusted by. But I don’t care what others think about my relationship. It works and it works well.

I read that men need sex to feel connected. But women need the connection to want to have sex. It makes a lot of sense. Most men in general have no idea what romance is. And most women need or want that romance in order to feel sexy. Are you listening Men? I say men because it’s usually the men in relationships that don’t have a clue what romance is. If you’re a woman and you have no clue what romance is then you had better listen up too.

Romance is the little things that a partner does or should be doing to make their other half  feel appreciated. Or to show her/him that you’ve been thinking about her/him during the day. That’s why women/men get excited if out of the blue you come home with a bouquet of flowers. Romance is for out of the blue. It’s when you call on your way home and tell your spouse to get dressed because you’re taking them out to dinner. No kids, Get a sitter. If you can only get away for an hour that’s fine. It’s the fact that he wants to be with you and only you that matters.

Romance can be when you order your spouse their favorite perfume with out them knowing. Or when you pick up their favorite chocolates for no reason at all. Well there is a reason and that’s that you love her.

My husband will drive an hour to get me the bagels that I love and not tell me until he walks through the door with them in his hand. He picks daisy’s on the side of the road and spells out I love you in candy kisses on the table so that its the first thing I see in the morning.

Romance doesn’t have to cost you an arm and a leg. It’s the fact that you thought about your spouse and you wanted them to know you were thinking of them that counts.

Now for the sex. This is after all a Sex w/Annie’s blog, lol. If you can’t look each other in the eyes and passionately kiss them then something is wrong. Or if you’ve been putting up with boring sex for years and you’ve never even tried to make it better you’re screwed and not in a good way.

That’s right I said it. If after twenty-five Sexy Sunday post you still haven’t figured out or even tried to fix your sex life then I don’t know what I’m going to do with you.

Maybe it’s that you just can’t bring yourself to talk about your boring sex life.  That’s not an excuse. We are all entitled to pleasure from our spouse. Sure we can pleasure ourselves, but it’s just not the same thing.

Having a warm body next to you, on top of you, under you, or behind you can and does make all the difference in the world.  What are you waiting for? If you don’t say something one of you is going to get tired of waiting and go find it else where. That is unless you both just don’t care.

And if that’s the case you still need to talk about your relationship. Life is too damn short to be living with a spouse that you just don’t care about anymore. When the sex is that bad that you could care less about that too well then maybe you should think about what’s next. Are you going to try to fix it, or not?

We all deserve to be loved and to have pleasurable sex lives. I can’t even imagine doing without it.  I’m talking about the kind of sex that’s so good it’s hard for me not to think about stopping right here and going to get some. But I can wait, maybe, yea I’ll wait.

Sex should be amazing every time.  Even a quickie should be that good. But if you’ve been doing the deed the same way for years or even months one of you has to speak up. If you’re calling it the deed that’s a sign right there that something needs to change. You need to re-invent your sex life. It’s time to start experimenting with each other. If you don’t then one of you will go find someone who will.

Try to have fun with this. Ask your partner these questions. You might be surprised at the answers and if nothing else it might open up a line of sexy communication.

1) When was the last time you did anything sexy together.

Showering together can be fun if you are in there soaping each other up. Sexy things tend to happen as your hands wonder over each others slippery bodies. Just don’t hog the water.

Have you ever painted your woman’s toe nails. Or when was the last time you sat together on the couch watching a romantic comedy. It may sound boring but when those sex scenes come up that’s when feelings get stirred. It’s also when a good kiss can awaken your senses..

2) Try dressing up and getting out of the house. It’s called date night..

Call a cab or have someone drop you off at a club or bar that has entertainment. Sit in the corner where it’s dark. Have a couple of drinks and loosen up. Now touch, kiss, dance. This should get you both in the mood. Maybe you’ll even try a new position when you get home.

3) Maybe it’s time you took that toy out of the package.

You know what toy I’m talking about ladies.  The toy you bought at that fuckerware party you went to months ago. I know that when I go to one of those my husband can’t wait to see what I’ve purchased. Just knowing that I went to the party I know my Sir is home waiting to ravish me as soon as I walk in the door. But I also know that most woman at these parties are curious. They giggle a lot. They want to know how they too can have or get some of that amazing sex they only hear about.

4) Alright ladies it’s time to pull out that romance book you’ve been reading.  See if that doesn’t wake up the dragon in side his pants.

Start out by saying to him that you’ve been reading this sexy book and it gets you wet.  He just may look at you in a whole new way. Maybe he thought you had given up. And just maybe all you need is a little kinky fuckery..Just try and have fun with it.

I started sharing my romance books with my husband years ago. At first I couldn’t read them out loud to him. I used to put the TV on mute and ask him to read the hot sexy scene to himself. Of course that changed and now that I write erotic romance it’s a whole new ball game around here.  Make sure it’s not a long scene. Men can’t read more than an article without getting bored. Just get to the sex. After he reads the scene ask him what he thinks about trying something new..

5) No panties..

Try going out of the house in a skirt or dress and leave your panties in the drawer. Now don’t tell him until you get to that store. Once inside take his hand and rub it up your thigh and in between your legs. Now watch the sexy smile that comes across his face. He will follow you around that store like a puppy dog. Try reaching for something and see how attentive he can be. This is fun stuff. The sex should be amazing on a day like this..Using these little games will keep your sex life new and of course exciting.

Then next time you go out try thigh highs and no panties.. Keep him guessing and have fun with this..

6) Take your man to a strip club.

Yes, you heard me right. When I first met my Sir he and I would go to the strip club every week. Staying for an hour was all it took. It was hot to have all of those half naked women dancing for us. Sure they wanted our money. I would touch my then boyfriends cock through his pants under the bar. We had sex as soon as we got home. Sometimes we didn’t make it home before one of us came.

7) Porn?

Ask your husband/spouse to find some porn that you both can watch.  He’s going to pick up that computer faster than you can say Porn. Watching porn together or any kind of sexy scene’s can get you both in the mood quickly.

8) Three questions each..

Make up three sex questions that you’ve been afraid to ask each other. Put them in envelopes and seal.

Go out for ice cream. Then find a park bench away from other people. You don’t want to get interrupted.

Just the fact that your spouse is going along with this means he/she wants to fix or spice up your sex life too.  Maybe flip a coin to see who goes first. Then start reading the questions, and alternate.

Maybe all he wants is the lights on. Or for you to wear a blindfold so he can have his way with you.  Wearing a blindfold shows how much you trust your spouse. And it just may be the one thing that will save your relationship.

If you want to get kinky ask him to get some of those Velcro straps. Won’t you be surprised if he already has them. Or when he brings them home tomorrow.

That’s what we started with. I had no idea he had bought them. I remember how nervous I was when I walked into my bedroom and saw them on the bed.  I could clearly see he was excited. All he said was, No talking.  Of course I giggled and blushed.

The sex was off the charts that night and things haven’t stopped since. You just need to communicate. And if every month you have to jot down questions on a card and go for ice cream isn’t that better than having to go see a lawyer.

9) Vibrator for two..

Have you seen the vibrator with the remote. What husband or partner isn’t going to love having control of your pussy from across the room. These can be fun. Just be careful who you’re talking too when your spouse decides to turn it up a notch. It won’t take long before you are begging for some hot sex. I bet you don’t make it home with this one.

10) Go for it..

What have you got to lose besides each other. Start touching, feeling, Kissing and sucking each other. And  have some fun with it, make sure you don’t take it too seriously. Laughter is a good thing.  Having your partner/spouse touch you in ways no one else can is exciting. So Go for it.

Have a Very Sexy Sunday.

And don’t forget the lube..

The message bar and other toys such as the two-way vibrator, Velcro straps, shaving cream, and lube can all be found at Goodvibes.com

 

11 thoughts on “Re-inventing Your Sex Life is Sexy Sunday # 26

    • I had a feeling that guys were going to like the porn, strip clubs and of course the erotica, Lol.. These are fun things to do to get your sexy motors running, Don’t you think? Don’t forget the lube Billy..Jersey Hugs coming your way.. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

        • Lol, Are you kidding I can’t even find out how to post better emoticon symbols for my reviews. I wanted tits, boobs, five tits up or down. the best I could do is hearts, Ugh!

          Lube is a good thing Billy. Natural is good but nothing beats that slippery stuff in a bottle or tube.. 😀

          Liked by 1 person

    • Yes! So glad you you get what I said. Without mutual respect I don’t see how it could possibly work.
      Once you find the one who treats you like a woman, his woman and all that comes with being his woman never let him go. Thanks for the comment, I appreciate it.. 🙂

      Like

    • Thanks for the comment Broken Submissive. What a nice thing to say. Yes he’s a keeper alright.. He keeps me on my toes and keeps a smile on my face. we’ve been through so much and somehow we’ve kept it together. Knowing that he’s always going to pick me up when I fall makes life easier if you know what I mean.. Hope you tune in next Sunday for my next Sexy Sunday Post.. 🙂

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  1. I found this through Oceanswater’s blog. I loved it, would like to reblog… but I don’t know how (I cannot seem to figure out how to put in my blog’s name when I use the button. Because I’m on Blogger?).
    Do you mind if I copy and paste, providing a link to your blog of course, and stating your name! I don’t want to use your words as my own, I just want for them to appear directly rather than just pasting a link (I feel it’s less conducive to people actually reading the words).
    Couldn’t find an email address to send this to… I’ll wait until I hear from you to do anything about it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Dawn, So sorry I’ve been writing my second book and of course life can get in the way of blogging. Thank you for so much for wanting to re-blog. Hit the re-blog and it will come up with your blog name, Click on it and Put a sentence in, then hit post. That’s all there is too it. my email is aedmonds315@gmail.com just in case you have any problems. Thanks again and I hope you like next Sunday’s post too. I’m writing about Dom’s. Should be fun..Annie..

      Like

Just sayin..

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