It may be hump day as in, “Hey Mike, What day is it?” But to all of you couples out there who are anticipating the weekend. Have you done any kinky shopping yet? I know you’re waiting for that unmarked package of delight. But do you have the proper attire when it does arrive?
You may be asking yourself, “What the hell is this crazy woman saying now?” I’m talking about setting the mood for a night of kink. An all-out let me get into your pants and make you cum like you’ve never cum before Freaky Friday kind of night.
I’m talking about the kind of night where you put on one of your man’s collard dress shirts, and a pair of sexy high heels. Or better yet a schoolgirl outfit complete with checkered skirt, knee highs, black heels red lipstick and don’t forget the hair kind of night.
No matter what it is you’re planning it’s all about the end result. And if this all works out the way you think. You will both be out of breath with smiles on your faces thinking I wish I had a cigarette by the time this Freaky Friday night is over.
But this takes a little planning. And for those of you who like spontaneity well the best thing to do is to be ready for when the mood strikes. You need to have the toys in your night stand, and the other kinkery in your closet. Your sex life is about to take a turn for the better.
You know what your partner likes. And if for some odd reason you don’t know what they like it’s time to ask them. Do they like fishnets, and leather? Or do they like soft sexy lingerie? Either way you have to be ready for when the night takes that kinky turn.
For me I am always thinking about this kind of night. If my man looks at me a certain way I can be ready in fifteen minutes for just about anything. And that’s because I have all the tools so to speak. You see, I have planned for days and nights of passion and kink.
Think about it this way, a chef has his pots, pans and knives. A manicurist has her nail files clippers and polish. And people who think about having mind blowing orgasms have a draw full of dildos, vibrators and lube among other things. We also have a closet where we keep whatever it is that turns you and your partner on.
So the next time you’re at the mall walk into Victoria secret. Or even Target and Walmart, turn that cart into the panties and bra isle. Grab yourself something that you know you will feel sexy in. Don’t forget the thigh highs, I have been told that men love thigh highs. . And guys if you’re buying your woman something sexy make sure you know her size. You wouldn’t want to bring home something that doesn’t fit her beautiful body.
And while you’re in Target Make sure you turn that cart into the isle where the pads and tampons are too. You’re about to see things that you never realized were there before. I bet you didn’t know that every douche isle also has lube and Trojan vibrators. Now those vibrators are not I repeat are NOT for the experienced vibrator connoisseur. But they are good for someone who hasn’t used a vibrator before or someone that hasn’t used a vibrator in a long while.
But if you really want a vibrator save your hard earned money for the magic wand I talked about on Sexy Sunday. Or go to the front of page of my blog and click on the most wonderful sex toy in the world. Your wife/partner will thank you for it many, many times. She may even surprise you and start making herself cum all on her own. Don’t get jealous if she does guys. The more a woman orgasms the more she wants it. Just make sure you brush up on your licking/cunnilingus skills. If you want her to suck you silly you had better learn how to lick some pussy. Just Sayin..
And since you’re already thinking about sex, you might as well get started tonight. I’m not talking about anything crazy unless that’s what you’re ready for. If you are still in the take it slow mode than maybe this is the night you start to read your significant other a few scenes from my kinky hot erotic romance. I guarantee it’s going to get the juices flowing and both of you will want to let off some steam. Try page seven, lol..
Or if you’re waiting for a package from one of the online adult toy store’s how about you just talk to each other. Yes you’ve heard me say this before; communication is the key to a happy healthy sex life. It’s also the key to a successful marriage. Without communication how will you know what your partner is craving? Maybe neither one of you is the same person you used to be. If that’s the case you will need to get to know one another all over again.
If you are stuck and really don’t know what turns you on anymore there are ways to make you horny. Use your brain. Watch some sexy hot scenes on the internet. You wouldn’t believe what I have seen while doing research for my erotic books. I will tell you that if you can think about it there are others who have done it and are doing it.
Why not become voyeuristic while sitting at your computer tonight. Whatever shame you’re mom has put into your head it’s time to throw it out the window. Remember this is your sex life. Punch whatever it is that turns you on into the search engine and see what pops up. More than likely it’s going to be your libido that goes from zero to a hundred.
All I am trying to do is help you get your strut back. Do you remember that strut? The way you used to walk into a room when you knew your sweetie would be there. Remember when you used to get dressed up in those tight jeans. You Put on some make up, sprayed that perfume everywhere and walked out the door every Friday night. And men you did the same thing, maybe without the make-up but you you put on your cologne. You still smelled nice and looked great too. Well you can still do that. Going out on a date is something that all couples should do, especially if you have kids.
Couples need that time away to just talk to each other. No talking about the kids on Date night. This is the time for you and your best friend, your lover. Do you remember who your lover is? Bringing up the kids will put you into parent mode and you won’t be thinking about playing with her pussy under the table and forget about all that licking and sucking you could both be talking about. STOP TALKING About The KIDS.
Make Date night the night you discuss what you have planned or are planning for your weekend. This is how you used to think when you were dating. Send messages and text to your lover and make them explicit; I am going to suck you silly, or Wait till you feel the new toy I am going to tease your love button with. This’s what’s going to get you to Freaky Friday, or suck me silly Saturday, and yes even Sexy Sunday.
Or you can go straight to a hotel and fuck each other silly. Then go grab a bite to eat at the dinner down the street.
Have fun with this. It’s not a competition, its adult playtime. You should both be laughing and giggling .And remember you make the rules. Always be safe sane and consensual. I am hoping that you are all listening. And don’t forget the Lube.